Monthly Archives: July 2017

Domain change

After an entirely unexpected drop of the extremely popular domain (yes, visitors from Google, “ is down”!), it became impossible to reach the website via due to an unreachable path to FreeDNS. Thus, I decided to just finish moving to It took a while to figure out how to get WordPress back up and pointing to, but I eventually succeeded.

What I do not know, however, is if I will succeed in finishing the account of the Japan travel. I have been putting that off for too long now. Ugh.


Without the Internet, I would never have amassed the knowledge I currently hold today. The wild success of the knowledge powertrains of Wikipedia and Google fail to cease captivating users into learning something new every day.

Yet, I loathe the Internet in numerous ways. It’s become what is virtually (literally virtually) a drug habit, and in a way worse than a drug habit because I depend on it for social needs and information. Without it, I would lose interesting, common-minded people to talk with, as well a a trove of information that I would have to buy expensive books for.

But without the development of the Internet, what would humanity be…? I suppose we would return to the days where people would actually be inclined to talk face-to-face, invite each other to their houses, play around, sit under a tree reading a book, debug programs, go places, make things. It wouldn’t necessarily be a better future, but it would certainly be a different one. If it took this long to develop the Internet (not very long, actually), imagine the other technologies we are missing out on today.

And then there is the problem of the masses. The problem lies not in the quantity itself, it’s that attempting to separate oneself from the group merely attempts to imply elitism. And you end up with some nice statistics and social experiments and a big beautiful normal model, with very dumb people on one end and very intelligent people on the other.

This wide spectrum means that conflict is abound everywhere. People challenge perspectives on Reddit, challenge facts on Wikipedia, challenge opinions on forums, challenge ideas on technical drafts and mailing lists. And on YouTube, people just have good ol’ fistfights over the dumbest of things.

On the Internet, the demographic is completely different than in human society, even if the Internet was supposed to be an extension of human society. The minority – yes, those you thought did not exist: the adamant atheists, the deniers, the libertarians, the conspiracists, the trolls – suddenly become vocal and sometimes violent. The professionalism with which the Internet was designed in mind is not to be found on any of the major streams of information. This is not ARPANET anymore. These are not scientists anymore studying how to run data over wires to see if they can send stuff between computers. These are people who believe the Internet is freedom at last. Freedom to love, freedom to hate; to hack, to disassemble, to make peace, to run campaigns, to make videos, to learn something, to play games, to make opinions, to argue, to agree, to write books, to store things, to pirate software, to watch movies, to empathize, to converse, to collaborate, or just to tell the world you really hate yourself.

Thus, I am a victim of freedom and a slave to it. My friends do not talk to me anymore. I am just left with solitude and a keyboard.


This entire blog is the reason I’m not going to get a job in the future.

And if you keep thinking like this, you really won’t.

This website is so heavy in material that I deemed it dangerous to put on GitHub, so I removed it from there. My GitHub profile comes in contact with way too many people now, and one day they might be recruiters. They will not necessarily be recruiters of reputable companies, but they will take notice of my problems anyway. On the surface, I know my stuff. Good poise, eloquent diction. Very technical. Splendid work ethic. On the deep end: contrived, arrogant, anxious, troubled, and terribly unpredictable.

When it comes for resume time, mine looks weak.

  • No formal job experience in a technology company (this man has no ability to interact in a diverse workplace environment).
  • No formal education in computer science, except the classes he took in high school (this man knows nothing and should wait until his junior year of college).
  • No outstanding computer-related awards, despite this candidate’s purported devotion to computer science. (If this guy is a genius, where’s his award from USACO and TopCoder?)
  • No continuing hobbies (this man is single-minded and is going to burn himself out).

Every contest I am eligible for, I compete against college students in their junior and senior years, doing algorithms and some wondrous magic I have absolutely no training in. Do I care about writing hacky code on B-trees to earn some points I use to hype my professional self? NO! I care about writing actual code, used in actual applications. The problem is that nobody wants to use your code. That’s right, no one. They’ll -2 your code on Gerrit, ask you to send your CLA via fax to some random toll-free number and wait 5 business days for processing, and do everything they can to block your pull requests. When it’s your application, the investors and the judges will question every decision you have made up to that point in time, unless you use media buzzwords that inaccurately represent your super-simple program yet make them warm and fuzzy on the inside.

The question is, has this ever happened to you? How do you know they’ll do this to you? Looks like you really have no experience. Clearly, your blank resume represents you very accurately indeed.

Most problems you have encountered and written about on your blog have been caused by you, and only you. The distinguishing factor is that you put the blame on other people and fail to accept responsibility for your own problems. Own up to your mistakes like the man you are going to become. Remember your bad experience in the Japan trip from not going to Akihabara? That was all YOU. YOU were the one who decided to go with the wrong group, YOU were the one who decided to spend time in places that weren’t worth a visit, YOU were the one who decided to go to Harajuku instead of Akihabara. No, it wasn’t the tour’s fault, so you should change your review to four stars. And you enjoyed it right? So change it to five. It’s rude behavior in the travel industry to give bad reviews. If you had a good time, then give a good review. Don’t nit-pick the small stuff, think about the larger picture.

If you continue like this, you’re never going to make it through college, so you better delete everything in this blog and hope it hasn’t already damaged you. Yes, that’s right, DELETE ALL OF IT and consult a mental health professional right away.

Where did you get this quote from? Did you write this yourself? Why do you make things up and condemn yourself for things that you can’t even control? Just chill out, man.

I can’t chill out. There is no sense of progress in the office. My dad doesn’t even pay me, even for the time I work. But if I haggle, then he’ll give me looks and might scold me for asking for money.

Some ideas

Concept of AI itself

I’ve glanced at many papers (knowing, of course, that I know very little of their jargon) and concluded that the recent statistical and mathematical analysis of AI has simply been overthought. Yet the theory of AI from the 70s and 80s delves to entirely conflicting perspectives of the driving force of AI in association with the morality and conscious factors of the human brain.

Think about the other organs of the body. They are certainly not simple, but after 150 years, we’ve almost figured them out, how they work mechanically and chemically. The challenge is how they work mathematically, and I believe that an attempt to determine an accurate mathematical representation of the human body would essentially lead to retracing its entire evolutionary history, up to the tiny imperfections of every person across each generation. Just as none of our hands are shaped the same, our brains most likely are structured uniquely, save for its general physical structure.

I conjecture that the brain must be built on some fundamental concept, but current researchers have not discovered it yet. It would be a beautiful conclusion, like the mass-energy equivalence that crossed Einstein’s mind when he was working in the patent office. It would be so fundamental that it would make AI ubiquitous and viable for all types of computers and architectures. And if this is not the case, then we will adapt our system architectures to the brain model to create compact, high-performing AI. The supercomputers would only have to be pulled out to simulate global-scale phenomena and creative development, such as software development, penetration testing, video production, and presidential-class political analysis and counsel.

Graph-based file system

Traditional file systems suffer from a tiny problem: their structure is inherently a top-down hierarchy, and data may only be organized using one set of categories. With the increasing complexity of operating systems, the organization of operating system files, kernel drivers, kernel libraries, user-mode shared libraries, user-mode applications, application resources, application configurations, application user data, caches, and per-user documents is becoming more and more troublesome to attain. The structure of POSIX, in the present, is “convenient enough” for current needs, but I resent the necessity to follow a standard method of organization when it introduces redundancy and the misapplication of symbolic links.

In fact, the use of symbolic links exacerbates this fundamental problem of these file systems: they work on a too low level, and they attempt to reorganize and deduplicate data, but simply increasing the complexity of the file system tree.

Instead, every node should be comprised of a metadata as well as data or a container linking to other nodes. Metadata may contain links to other metadata, or even nodes comprised solely of metadata encapsulated as regular data. A data-only node is, of course, a file, while a containerized node is a directory. The difference, however, is that in a graph-based file system, each node is uniquely identified by a number, rather than a string name (however, a string name in the metadata is to be used for human-readable listings, and a special identifier can be used as a link or locator of this node for other programs).

The interesting part about this concept is that it completely defeats the necessity of file paths. A definite, specific structure is no longer required to run programs. Imagine compiling a program, but without the hell of locating compiler libraries and headers because they have already been connected to the node where the compiler was installed.

The file system size could be virtually limitless, as one could define specifics such as bit widths and byte order upon the creation of the file system.

Even the kernel would base itself around the system, from boot. Upon mount, the root node is retrieved, linking to core system files and the rest of the operating system; package management to dodge conflicts between software wouldn’t be necessary, as everything is uniquely identified and can be flexibly organized to correctly define which applications require a specific version of a library.

In essence, it is a file system that abandons a tree structure and location by path, while encouraging references everywhere to a specific location of data.

Japanese visual novel using highly advanced AI (HAAI)

This would be an interesting first product for an aspiring AI company to show off its flagship “semi-sentient” AAI product. Players would be able to speak and interact with characters, with generated responses including synthesized voices. A basic virtual machine containing an English and Japanese switchable language core, a common sense core (simulating about ten years’ worth of real life mistakes and experiences), and an empathy core (with driver, to be able to output specific degrees of emotion) should be included in the game, which developers then parametrize and add quirks for each character, so that every character finishes with a unique AI VM image.

In fact, the technology showcased would be so successful that players would spend too much time enjoying the authentic human-like communication, getting to know the fictional characters too well, warranting the need to place a warning for players upon launching the game (like any health and safety sign) stating that “This game’s characters use highly advanced artificial intelligence. No matter how human-like these fictional characters interact, they are not human beings. Please take frequent breaks and talk to real, human people periodically, to prevent excessive attachment to the AI.”


Look, I’m sorry I couldn’t get to the travel account. I’ll finish it over the weekend or something, and in return I will make this one concise.

The people of orientation were very friendly and thoughtful, almost to a Japan level of thoughtfulness and convenience. Even the food service people were competent in their jobs, in contrast to my horrible experience with lunch ladies in high school, where they just yell at you something and you don’t quite know what they said, but you say “Yes” anyway.

But when it was time to register, I thought it was going to be all right. I had planned to make a script to register all of my classes the moment that the registration opened, but I didn’t think the interface would prevent you from even getting to that menu before it was time, so I was unable to capture the HTTP requests for replaying. The infrastructure held together at the last moment from all of that incessant refreshing for the opening, but a few seconds before, the gates of hell opened once more to my mortal eyes. The servers slowed to a grinding halt during the redirects.

Once I confirmed my email and clicked a tiny little checkbox, I was then able to access the registration page, in which I entered the five-digit “nuclear codes” which I had determined after many hours of advising. Some of them gave me red error text; I read it quickly and moved on to the next numbers.

The casualties were my first-year “signature” course, which filled up 100% within 120 seconds of registration opening, and second-semester Japanese, which was on waitlist, but I was not allowed to enter the waitlist because prerequisites were being enforced.

I thought “quick, let me register for Government” which is another class I’ll eventually have to take, but alas, the ones available conflict with my schedule.

I wish I could just leave and admit defeat, but I couldn’t because I was missing three credit hours to deem me a full-time student. I kept browsing around, finding ways to prove to myself that every single course was full. When everyone was gone from the room, one of the advisors told me some course numbers that had not been taken yet that could be used to fulfill a requirement, and then drop once I could take Japanese. I don’t even think I’ll be able to take Japanese this semester, to be honest. It’s waitlisted, and sticking to a crappy class and crappy dorm seem to be the status quo.

During the day, I felt all right, but at night I kind of realized how antisocial I am, and how there are simply an excess number of people for me to ever correct that without professional help. I thus considered professional help, but sadly didn’t think that there would be any time for me to make any sort of consultation with anyone. I also didn’t know if they would notify my parents. I don’t want my parents to be notified. I already told you: because that makes the whole family in need of professional help, and then we all get thrown into group therapy, which sucks. And then to make me guilty, my parents will repeatedly suggest me to see a “spiritual director” which does not solve problems caused by chemical imbalances and is still unable to make a diagnosis. If I think I have anxiety, which I do, and need a beta blocker or something, well a spiritual director is probably going to tell me “it’s just some bad things and you just pray and meditate and relax and it’ll go away.” Really? It will go away? I am not criticizing the spiritual director’s job; they help people who just need to talk to someone about life problems; I am criticizing my parents who think that a spiritual director is just a throw-in, cheapo equivalent to a psychologist. After ranting for almost two years now, with the tendency of subordinating myself toward others and practically asking for the bottom of the barrel since I was twelve or so, is this really a temporary problem? But somehow, I have to explain to them this, but I don’t even know how.

It’s college and everything is supposed to change, but really I’m just whining at a higher level, and still not getting what I’m paying a good sum of money for.



Now that I’ve graduated and my trip to Japan is over (still working on that memoir/account), it’s time for me to bring my brain back to rewind mode.

The good news is that I haven’t killed myself from stress yet, and the Japan trip was actually enjoyable, rather than some horrible disappointment.

The bad news is that I feel like I fit in less into the world now.

Back then, I was just a kid and I let my dad take care of all of the important work. I knew my role: I was a kid, and my dad was the guardian. Now, my dad passes on an unknown quantity of responsibilities back onto me, and now it’s not clear what he wants of me. I still need his signature for many documents, but it is still my responsibility to keep the submission of such documents within deadlines, which is difficult given my dad doesn’t care about my deadlines. I tell him that he needs to sign something and he never does it, or maybe I find him sleeping on the couch. My prayerful mother is oblivious to paperwork and requires me to answer many questions and wait for her to put on her glasses and carefully read what she is about to sign, before she even attempts to ask for a pen. This is, of course, assuming she isn’t still at work or praying quietly somewhere.

  • Code Lyoko, my favorite franchise, is dead.
  • Garry’s Mod, my favorite sandbox game of all time, is on the way to the grave now.
  • I don’t even play Team Fortress 2 anymore, or even any video game in particular now.
  • School is over.
  • Young people in their twenties or thirties are filling in menial labor positions. This somewhat concerns me because it feels as if there is some kind of upsurge in unemployment or oversupply of skilled labor, or perhaps high demand for unskilled labor as people retire. For example, my last bus driver looked like he was in his twenties.
  • My house is not surrounded by a forest anymore, but rather more houses.
  • Parents of newer generations are being trained to be more paranoid about the Internet, that everyone is a stalker and everyone is out to get you and find your house and kidnap you.
  • Companies are being overrun with young programmers a little older than me, kids who think that ambition is easy and that every idea should be supported.

I only listed this because after a week of not being at home and not touching a computer, I realized everything in my life has changed yet remained the same, like the dust that constantly rests on furniture yet is quick to leave when blown lightly. The dust is simply replaced with new dust.

Even the local horse racing park is shown to have a changing demographic. I don’t see as many smokers anymore blowing all their retirement money betting their butts off all day, because they’re dead or they’re out of money and they want to retire for good. Now I see parents being followed by kids and employees who appear slightly friendlier to newcomers. Sometimes I’m even concerned about the future of horse racing as a whole: maybe in forty years it’ll be long gone. People won’t think racing horses is humane anymore.

And now what? The burden of the future is shifting onto my shoulders now. They say it is sinful to dwell on anything except the present. It would be nice if I could stop deadlocking myself with posts about nostalgia. I have things to do, you know.

I must finish the account. The memories are fading quickly from my mind…